The Frustrated CFO

World Economy News Flash: Practical Application of Greece's Bailout

This morning, as soon as I entered Citibank's online trade-finance services, the following message jumped into my face:

Notice on Greek payments

Please be aware that Capital Controls have been introduced in Greece, as a result international transfers from Greek bank accounts to bank accounts outside Greece will not be processed until further notice.  Domestic electronic payments are expected to be processed, but are dependent on the local market factors and beneficiaries' banks.  Securities settlements are suspended.

Apparently "Capital Controls," accepted by the Greek government as one of the German government's bailout conditions, means freezing pretty much everyone's bank accounts - large and small companies, individuals, trusts, etc.  I have no doubt that this harsh measure adds fuel into the engine of Greece's newly-formed leftist anti-bailout party.  They must be having a field day with this - such a perfect agitation tool!  But an important lesson for everyone around the world to learn is that, in case of a "national emergency," your government will find a way to separate you from your money. Remember this!       

10 HR Lessons From Summer-Binging on "The Good Wife" Plus Some Other Stuff

In the TV business, summer traditionally has been considered an off-season.  Primarily because the broadcast networks' prime series go on a 4-month hiatus after completing their 20+ episode seasons.  Nowadays, of course, it's not all that relevant for TV viewers, because...  Well, for multiple reasons, really, but to name a few:  

First of all, if you prefer edgier premium cable series, your TV viewing patterns are driven by  2-3 month seasons scheduled at different times throughout the year: Shameless airs January through March, Game of Thrones and Silicon Valley - April -June, Masters of Sex - July-September, Homeland -  October-December, etc.  Even if you are into blending your TV cocktail out of cable and broadcast ingredients, you most likely use on-demand and DVR options to accommodate your personal schedules and to fill the airing gaps.  Plus, some broadcast networks now have "summer shows" - short-seasoned and "limited" series aired specifically to cover the off-season void: Hannibal, Wayward Pines, Under the Dome, Aquarius, etc.

The most important factor, however, is that we've stopped being restricted by conventional TV ever since Netflix came along.  First, they made the idea of going to video stores and looking for something to watch unnecessary.  We were so grateful for digital searching, online ordering, and USPS drop-ins and drop-offs.  But then even walking to the mailbox became unnecessary, because they made a tremendous volume of content available for IP streaming, including rare and obscure movies, shows, documentaries, anime, etc. from all over the world! 

They didn't stop there either - they got into creating their own original programming.  And then Amazon followed suit!  As a result, we got access to gems that make me feel as if I am living through some sort of an indie renaissance via the Internet: House of Cards, Orange Is the New Black, Peaky Blinders, Grace and Frankie, Sense8 (Netflix originals), Transparent and Mozart in the Jungle (Amazon's originals).  It's fucking incredible!

Moreover, not only that streaming content is available everywhere you can go online, it's available in whole seasons.  There is no waiting for weeks at a time until the next episode; no mid-season separation anxiety; no loss of vital details from previous weeks.  Technically you can watch a 12-episode season in one day.  It is my understanding that some people actually do that. 

Netflix had at their hands the best market-testing sample imaginable - their entire subscription base.  They must've noticed early on that a large percentage of the viewing population doesn't restrict itself to one episode at a time.  They even installed a special probe at the start of the third consecutively watched episode to test whether you are actually binging or have simply fallen asleep on your couch.  Brilliant! 

Yes, binging - as in excessive indulgence, as in manifestation of addictive personality traits.  Not a new thing, really.  TV networks (USA especially) have been scheduling rebroadcasting marathons since the 80s.  By offering this opportunity to audiences with pretty much any kind of preferences, Netflix forever altered the cultural lives of millions of people. 

The phenomenon itself became a marketing tool for Netflix's competitors, who want you to know that you can replicate this experience with them as well:  This summer, Amazon actually used the phrase "binge on your favorite shows for free" in its promotional messages for Premium subscriptions.  HBO, still holding onto their highbrow status, softens it by offering you to "feast" on your past and present favorite shows on HBO GO.

Poor David Foster Wallace warned, way before streaming had become a household concept, that Television is the one and only true American addiction.  He predicted that catering to user demand for content of their choice whenever and wherever they wanted it (remember the "direct dissemination"?) may irrevocably alter us and potentially result in the crumbling of human will.

But who am I to judge?  Yes, my life is too busy for hardcore binging and I refuse to watch an episode of anything on my goddamned iPhone, but I've been taking advantage of on-demand entertainment ever since it was first introduced by American cable providers 15 years ago.  Then came iTunes 6.0 (2005).  Today - Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu Plus, HBO Go, Showtime Anytime - I've got them all, including a Fire Stick to carry them with me wherever I go. 

But that was not the topic of this post, was it? (Too bad you cannot hear me laughing at myself.)  This was meant to be a brief introduction to the shocking fact that, even with all that variety of quality entertainment on hand, at some point in July I found myself with my personal TV time-slot empty.  And let me tell you, that made it hard to ignore the binging and feasting callings of the content pushers.

I browsed the variety of offerings and ended up with The Good Wife on Amazon Prime.  It used to be one of the shows I watched during its active seasons - all the way through the middle of Season 4.  But then, 2013 announced its arrival to Netflix with their first two major originals, plus Top of the Lake, plus The Fall, the first season of Broadchurch, etc., etc.  I'm a busy woman - something had to go.  Now I picked up where I left off.  

I have to admit, assuming you manage not to paralyze your life or degrade your mental and motoric agility, watching multi-season, multi-episode shows without gaps measured in weeks and months has its undeniable benefits.  Complex and intricate storytelling loses some of its power when it's broken up into weekly installments and then gets shelved away for 4 or more months.  Reducing these gaps not only allows for a more detail-oriented viewing, it also gives you an opportunity to assess the show's merits and values in a more coherent way. 

Aside from the most obvious and well acknowledged attributes of The Good Wife - strive for realism; acute attention to the impact of technology on our lives; honest depiction of shifting morality; head-on tackling of race, class, gender, sex, and all other divides - what I like the most about the show is its refusal to label itself as a single genre.  We can definitely identify it as a Drama, but the range of applicable modifiers is quite long - family, political, crime, legal, courtroom.

But what I realized while watching seasons 4 through 6 now, was that in it's wardrobe full of genres, The Good Wife's favorite outfit was the Workplace Drama.  One law firm, another law firm, State's Attorney's office, governor's office, clients' businesses (including a drug-distribution organization), you name it - all of them are depicted as places of employment.  And the human relationships inside these businesses play essential roles in the show's storytelling.  The office politics, alliances, squabbles, hiring, firing, promotion, compensation, peers' competition, subordination, fraternizing, partnerships, resignations, harassment, even telecommuting -  all of them have been used as plot points.

Once I started noticing, I've found so many typical and easily recognizable Human Resources issues,  it was hard to pick the following ten:

1. Any employee, no matter how highly positioned and compensated, is always a disgruntled employee.  It's remarkable how much pent-up gall towards Lockhart & Gardner started spilling out of Alicia and Cary as soon as they left to set up their own firm.  They were never that rude to any other opponents as they were to their former bosses.  What was it that Cary said to Will and Diane? That watching them squirm gives him an immense pleasure?  It's the nature of a subservient position - no matter what, we don't like it.
2. Why don't we like it?  Because there is no such a thing as a fair boss. Every boss believes that you belong to him, yet he doesn't really need you and will do just fine without you.  That's why bosses never bother acknowledging, even to themselves, your full contribution and think that you should be grateful for what you've got.  Aside from always high-in-demand Kalinda, all other major and minor characters have experienced that.
   
3. Recruitment is the most depressing of all managerial responsibilities.  Will and Diane need to hire more attorneys.  They sit down with their headhunter to look at the resumes she already preselected for them.  Barely glancing at them, Will goes, "No, no, no..."  And let me tell you, whether you are an asshole or a saint, this is what you do.  And I know that not everyone sees a life story behind every resume, still it's an incredibly unpleasant exercise for all.
4. An easy interview is rarely a successful one.  Will is interviewed by Geneva Pine and her colleagues in his bid for an outsourcing contract with the State Attorney's office.  It goes great - quick and short; no follow-up questions, no drilling into specifics.  Why? Because it's just a formality - Lockhart & Gardner were never even seriously considered. Whether you are pitching yourself for employment or your company's services for a contract, the interviewing principles are exactly the same.  A short, formal, and overly polite interview means that you are not getting the job.
5. Only full-time employment comes with benefits coverage.  This one is important because many people are still confused.  Kalinda, who has been working for Will for years, is appalled that newly hired Robin has medical coverage.  Except Kalinda cannot possibly qualify for benefits because she is a 1099 contractor with other billable businesses.  This allows her not only to delay paying social security taxes, but also makes a lot of her expenses tax deductible.  In order to receive company benefits one must be a full-time payroll employee with a minimum of a 30-hour workweek.  You cannot have it both ways.
6. All computing and communication devices provided by employers belong to the said employers.  I know that many viewers may feel dismayed when they hear various bosses on the show proposing to hack into their employees' emails.  The truth is, however, that the employers are absolutely within their rights.  All devices paid for by the employer and everything inside of them are the company's property.  Not only is it implicit, but it is explicitly outlined in every single Employee's Handbook.  Yet, so many people treat the company's equipment as their own.  Hillary's personal email debacle is one recent memorable example.  People, don't be cheap and lazy, buy yourself a personal phone, external hard drives, and whatever else you need to keep your private contacts, communications, and files separately.
7. The impervious pregnancy shield.  Governor Florrick's Ethics Czar Marilyn Garbanza is pregnant and the father is 76-year-old!  Can you trust a person like that with any type of government responsibility, let alone the one that requires clarity of reasoning?  Yet,  nobody reassigns her (of course, she cannot be fired - that's a lawsuit right there), because her condition blocks everyone's common sense.  In fact, her looks merited more suitability discussions than the fact that she made a decision to have a child with a septuagenarian.
8. Workplace honesty is a relevant thing.  There is an information leak from Florrick/Agos.  Three key people (two lawyers and one investigator) privy to the information are being questioned.  All three deny any involvement.  Alicia says, "These are the most honest people I know."  Mind you, at different points in time we've seen these characters mislead their clients, lie to their opposition, trap witnesses, steal information and evidence, even betray one another!  Yet, that was all done in the "normal course of business;" to get the job done, i.e. to perform your professional duties.  Nowadays, nobody considers dishonesty on behalf of one's employer amoral.  I've done it and you've done it; everyone does it.  Are we absolved and untainted because we presume there is no direct personal gain?  That's the question.
9. How do you know when someone in the office is sleeping with the boss? Look for the telling signs.  People cannot help themselves - they get emboldened by the perceived closeness to "power."  The person in question will stand too close, laugh too loud, dress inappropriately, pick fights with peers, become insufferable for subordinates and less diligent with their duties.
   
10. One should always be aware of the temporary and unstable nature of any HR structure.  People die, get arrested on obscure charges, move on for higher salaries, or decide to be homemakers.  Companies go through mergers, buy-outs, and hostile takeovers.  And nobody, literally nobody, has a good life - everyone is fucked up and thoroughly unhappy, no matter how hard they try to hide it.  So, there is always a good chance that they may check out - out of job or out of life.  Or do something completely insane, like trying to shift from Law into politics.

But the most valuable life lesson one should take away from The Good Wife is that you should never ever burn all the bridges and cut all the ties, because you never know with whom you may need to partner next.  

Banksy's Dismaland: A Social Experiment

On Saturday, August 22nd, internationally famous British street artist and social rebel Banksy declared his latest project Dismaland open to the public. 

I've noticed that many commentators rushed to label the large-scale art installation dystopian, but I tend to disagree.  Dystopia is an imaginary place where everything is scary and bad.  But Banksy's mini "park" in Weston-super-Mare (UK) is an artistic re-imagining of a fairy-tale theme park in the harsh light of our miserable reality.  From what I've seen, instead of saying, "Imagine if everything was horrible," the site screams, "Take off your pink glasses and see the horrors around you.  Look in the mirror and see who you are."

While Dismaland is basically a collective art show (50 artists in total) and Banksy himself contributed only 10 pieces of his own into the mix, it is first and foremost his aesthetic concept, his political declaration, his social commentary.  And even if you never bothered yourself with an interpretive analysis of art and know very little about this artist and his work, as long as you know something you most likely know that

1. Banksy is a provocateur.  As the best of the street artists before him, he seeks to stir and cause awareness.
2. Banksy is a social critic who is focused on exposing the flaws of contemporary society's structure and its perversity.
3. Banksy is a student of anthropology who probes human reactions to various stimuli he creates with his projects, from early anti-establishment graffiti to Exit through the Gift Shop and Gaza Strip Clip.  Some sharp and extraordinarily observant people have suggested, for example, that Mr. Brainwash was Banksy's creation from start to finish - a test to see how far hype can lead the artsy herd.     

Knowing this makes it hard to resist a thought that, regardless of the artistic merits and social significance of the individual pieces inside, a stationary installation with a six-week limited run and a daily allotment of only 2000 tickets priced at a laughable £3 is Banksy's latest experiment in human behavior.  His name itself is a perfect sensationalistic stimulus required to initiate the chain reaction ripe with observational material.  He already knows what an attraction he is - his 2009 Banksy vs. Bristol Museum show was attended by 300,000 people in 12 weeks.

It started immediately.  As soon as Dismaland's site came to life the day before yesterday, 6 million people attacked it trying to pre-book the admission tickets; crushing the site.  We cannot know what proportion of these people were scalpers, but a few tickets (most likely fake)  are being offered on eBay for $700.  (It's worth noting that the "park" would have to stay open for over 8 years to accommodate 6 million people).

Now that the online ticketing is disabled (supposedly temporarily - until Tuesday), people are queuing in person and there are definite reports of ticket hopefuls camping out around the site.  Of course, it is only the second day of the show, but it is easy to imagine that the number of campers will only increase. 

For those of us who stayed for hours and sometimes days in front of museums just to get in, or concert venues to win a place by the stage, it is easy to envision further developments: lists organized by orderly art-lovers, marks on hands, attempts to join a "party of friends" upfront, offers to buy someone's place for an exorbitant amount of money, yelling matches, and fist fights. 

Things like that happen around events that only last for a few hours.  This one will be open for six weeks.  So, those with the especially strong propensity for an escalation of commitment may be there for days upon days with limited access to food and hygiene - dirty, unfed, angry, and semi-violent "art lovers."   

Remember?  Dismaland is an absurd version of a Disney park and the most dismal part of a Disney experience is the lines.  Recreating that in an extreme way is an art piece of its own right.  Every single person trying to get in becomes a part of Banksy's art project and even more so when they finally get inside and start wandering among the attractions. 

So, ask yourself: Do you want to be a part of Banksy's social experiment?  It's up to you to decide whether it's more important to attend and be a subject in it, to watch from the sidelines through media, or to purposely not engage.  Banksy's Cinderella's Castle centerpiece seems to be asking the question - what will it take for people to look away?

Acknowledgement:  Special thanks to Y.A. Crow for invaluable advice and inspiring editing       

Just What Exactly Did the Doctor Order for the Healthy Living?

Three weeks ago, my 81-year-old father had to go to a hospital for angioplasty.  Truth be told, I'm not a big fan of my parents, but the tearful monster of the inevitable guilt demanded my dutiful attendance there.  

Aside from keeping company with someone who is forced to be in a scary medical place, where everyone's job is to cause you pain and discomfort for the sake of possible betterment, my presence there was actually useful in multiple ways. As sharp as my Dad still is and as good as the hospital staff turned out to be, the situation does call for a third-party facilitator: faster paperwork and check-in, better understanding of medical terminology, firmer grasp on the authority structure, timelier requests for assistance, etc. - little things that help.  I hope they did.

(I have to make a CFO's aside here.  In the past 30 years I've observed and directly dealt with many profit, non-profit, and government organizations, in professional capacity and as a functioning individual; in different countries around the world, in various social and economic systems.  Based on my cumulative personal experience, I am strongly inclined to conclude that Mount Sinai Heart - the internationally celebrated cardiology division of Mount Sinai Hospital - is one of the most organized, efficient, smoothly functioning business establishments I've ever seen, with the most sensible technology utilization to boot.  Considering that most of our existence nowadays takes place in the vile swamp of unmanaged laziness and pervasive unprofessionalism, being there was like a breath of fresh air.  I honestly didn't think that it was possible to have such an experience in our times.)

Everything went quite well and we were getting discharged in the early afternoon of the day after the procedure.  All documents that my Dad needed to take with him, for his personal records and to pass onto his referring doctors, were organized for him in a folio: surgeon's summary, nuclear images, blood work, EKG's, follow-up instructions (i.e. important documents) in the right-side pocket; hospital's legal documents, releases, disclaimers, general recommendations for cardiac patients (i.e. generic bullshit) in the left-side pocket.

I checked thoroughly everything on the right and glanced through the other side without intending to actually read anything there.  But a sheet of paper right on the top of the left-side pile caught my attention.  Not I only did I read it, but I also pulled it out of the folder and kept it, because it contained

Seven Tips for Healthy Living

• Move More
• Cut Fat
• Reduce Stress
• Wear Your Seat Belt
• Floss Your Teeth
• Keep a Positive Mental Outlook
• Drink Plenty of Water

First, the list amused me with its glorious banality and brevity.  I mean, all that sophisticated and extraordinarily expensive research and diagnostic equipment in the hands of doctors with international renown and exorbitant fees - and it all comes down to just these seven items?!  Where do I even start or end?  We are being fried by the unfiltered UV rays all year round.  We breathe the air that exponentially increases annual asthma statistics.  Everyone has some sort of an allergy and the skin conditions have intensified to the point of Desonide shortage on the market.  We don't know what we eat anymore.  Yes, there is information on the packaged food, but there is none on the tomatoes or any other loose vegetables.  Even if they carry the "certified organic" stickers, do you really trust USDA?  By the way, what about smoking, drinking, overmedication? Is all of that less important than flossing?  That's hilarious! 

On the second glance, the list bewildered me by its ambiguity and the fact that even as is, with all those missing pieces, it's absolutely unattainable. 

Okay, maybe I'm over-thinking it.  I showed it to someone incredibly level-headed and unruffled.  She was curious and unfazed: "Is this in order of importance?" she asked.  "Well, dear, I cannot really fucking tell!"  Let's say it is.  Some people I know would be appalled by the bottom placement of the water consumption.  Others (also personally known to me) would rejoice in seeing that their running two miles a day at a sprinter speed for the past 50 years appears to be at the top of the list. 

But I personally would definitely like to ask for more clarification.  And not only about the ranking of the tips.  Move more how?  Any type of movement?  Running, walking, flapping your hands in exasperation?  Fat - cut it down or cut it out?  All kinds of fats?  What about the ones that help the absorption of vitamins and nutrients?  And are people okay holding their phones in their hands while driving as long as they are wearing seat belts?  Even flossing!  After every meal like I do; once a day at night; before or after brushing? 

Never mind the individual interpretations, however!  At least items 1, 2, 4, 5, and 7 can be actively controlled by a person striving for a healthy living.  But the numbers 3 and 6 are totally different animals altogether!  Any doctor who gives a "reduce stress" advice is an equivalent of an accountant whose business recommendations amount to "buy low and sell high."  Dah!  Any other bright ideas?  There are so many factors that contribute to our stress levels, it would be stressful even to attempt listing all of them.   You can meditate for an hour, decompress,  and whatever, but you cannot stop your mind from reacting to your reality: as soon as the first thought about your life, and never-ending obligations, and overwhelming responsibilities, and guilt, and uncertainties creeps onto that clarified canvas, the stress is back on!

And don't even get me started on the Positive Mental Outlook!  Look around yourself - you literally have to be mental to be positive right now.  Didn't you notice how the people with supposedly the most positive of outlooks, i.e. pregnant women with small children in tow, actually look completely deranged?

So, let's not worry about the silly list from the famous hospital. I choose to believe it to be a joke from some humorous nerd in the hospital's administrative offices.  The good news is that we most likely don't need to work too hard on trying to stay healthy anyway.  The probability of the damage we caused this planet hitting us back real hard with one or another pandemic extermination is way too high.  And I'm pretty sure that doctors know that as well.          

Quote of the Week: The Doomed Choices We Make

"She had always known that in making certain choices one committed oneself to a sequence of actions - which inevitably meant a switch from being master of one's fate to being its slave - but she had hoped that she could decide when to make that switch, instead of having it forced upon her."

     Paul Griner

 Collectors: A Novel

A Little Study in Overcompensating

The book I am reading right now is written from inside of its female protagonist's head. Not in a floody stream-of-consciousness sort of way and not in a first-person POV either, but rather something in the middle - a third-person narrative that's interested only in what this woman sees and how exactly she feels about it.  Everything and everybody else is sketchy.   She is an interesting woman, though - an ad exec with a disturbing past and an uncertain future, severely unhappy and alone, and I am fascinated by the nuanced way the book's author (a man) depicts her impulses, reactions, and emotions.  Her feelings, if not her character, are quite relatable.   

About one-third into the book, there is this scene:  The protagonist just spent several hours on a sailboat with a man she met only a few weeks ago.  This outing was their first date and it went quite well in all expected and unexpected ways.  She is sure that the wonderful day will smoothly roll into a fantastic evening. (We are in her head, remember?  So, we are following various promising scenarios she envisions.)  They are walking along the dock towards her car and she feels incredibly elated.

Now, without changing his stride and still holding her hand, the guy tells her that cleaning the boat after the trip is a big job and he'd better get on it right away.  Basically, he is dismissing her and, as far as she is concerned, for no good reason.  Internally she is dismayed, but she keeps her cool - still holds his hand and says calmly, "I understand perfectly.  I've work to do myself."

As I said, I am sympathetic to this character.  Plus, situations like that, when reality totally clashes with your expectations and you have to find the best way out in a matter of seconds - they are not specific to intimate relationships; they are universal and I encounter them practically daily.  So, my ears got pricked up by the behavioral subtlety of the moment and I mentally congratulated the heroine on not falling into a socially awkward disaster and handling it well, without showing her actual emotions.  I'm hoping here that she gets into her car, smiles goodbye, doesn't say a word, and drives off. 

Bzzzzzzzzz! My compliments were premature!  Right in the next paragraph, she let's go of the man's hand, starts walking faster to pull ahead of him and says over her shoulder, "I probably shouldn't have come at all." 

Oh my God, overcompensation to the nth degree!  By trying to be excessively cool in order to cover her embarrassment, she made it only too obvious.  (I must state here that, from the literary standpoint and for the sake of the character's true nature, this faux pas was the only possible action and it foreshadowed the novel's resolution.  But let's get back to the overcompensating issue.)        

Whether in intimate encounters like this one or in any other interactions with our partners, coworkers, bosses, subordinates, clients, casual acquaintances, and accidental contacts (e.g. a coffee shop's barista or a waiter), the true damage of overcompensating in social situations is the fact that it produces an effect exactly opposite to what you are trying to achieve.  Instead of concealing your weaknesses and insecurities, you blow your cover and display your anxiety in its full nakedness to the very person whom you are trying to impress with your strength, power, independence, composure, superiority, or whatever.

This manifestation of one's social anxiety is incredibly hard to control.  For self-aware people it's like the mortal battle between the consciousness and the subliminal impulses.  And because the latter work faster, there is frequently not enough time to bite your tongue or correct your attitude.  You say to yourself, "When you see her, smile sweetly as if everything is fine.  She doesn't need to know that you feel tortured."  But then you actually see her, and the pain comes all over your face without you even registering it.

It doesn't matter how cocky and confident you appear most of the time.  If from time to time your tendency to overcompensate gets out of control, everyone exposed will know that you have weaknesses and buttons that can be pushed.  In fact, the worst cases of overcompensating I ever observed were presented by individuals who are generally perceived as self-assured and even arrogant (yours truly is included).  

I don't know whether people like me, who are really afflicted with the propensity to overcompensate, should be giving any advices on the matter.  Still, I would like to share my thoughts. 

When I analyze the situations, in which I managed to have a full grip on my compensatory urges, I find that not saying anything at all works the best - just staring without letting your eyes show any emotions at all, not uttering a word.  For me personally, it turns out to be even better than coming up with a seemingly appropriate response, because what appears witty and so fucking right at the moment, may seem dull, stupid, inappropriate, and powerless after the retrospective self-analysis that will, no doubt, come sooner or later.  And it doesn't matter if what you said actually worked on the other person.  Insecurity is incredibly self-centered.  For us, it is not about what actually happened, it's about how it makes Us feel.

So, silentium est aurum.  In fact, I have various short and long "Stop Talking" notes to myself placed in strategic locations everywhere - a note in my iPhone, an enveloped card in my pocketbook, a letter in my office diary, an earmarked entry in my desktop notebook at home, a sticky in my pencil drawer, etc., etc.  Do they help?  95% of the time in professional situations; 50% with strangers; almost never with those who cause me personal pain - that's where we are the weakest.